What NOT To do at Hogwarts!

by **Winnie** on Wed Oct 07, 2009 6:58 am

Here's a few to start:

1) I will not sing "We're off to See the Wizard" when I go to the headmaster's office.
2) I will not greet Professor MaGonnagall by saying "Hey, What's shakin', Pussycat?"
3) I will not Change the password to the Prefect's bathroom to "Getting Clean is almost as fun as getting Dirty!"
4) I will not try to convert the Hufflepuff's.
5) I will not call dumbledore a fairy.
6) There is, has never been, or will ever be a 5th house at hogwarts, and I did not found it.
7) Starting a betting pool on the fate of this year's Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher is tasteless and tacky, not a clever money-making concept.
8) "Springtime for Voldemort" is not an acceptable suggestion for class play.
9) If a classmate falls asleep, I will not take advantage of that fact and draw a Dark Mark on their arm.
10) Adding the name "Bueller" to Professor Binns' roster is not funny.
11) The Slytherin prefect is named Draco Malfoy, not "Rocky Horror."
12) I will not use Umbridge's quill to write "I told you I was hardcore".
13) "I've heard every possible joke about Oliver Wood's name" is not a challenge.
14) I will stop asking when we will learn to make "Love Potion Number Nine".
15) No matter how good a fake Australian accent I can do, I will not imitate Steve Irwin during Care of Magical Creatures class.

Just a few. ;D

by **Cial** on Wed Oct 07, 2009 7:45 am

1.) I will not sing the Harry Potter Puppet Pals song in class with friends.
2.) I will not poke Harry's scar until he admits it hurts a little.
3.) Every time a wizard gets hit with a spell during a duel I will not yell "PWNED"
4.) I will not yell dirty/bad words in parsletounge during class.
5.) I will refrain from calling the first book Harry Potter and the Sorcerer is stoned.
6.) I will not spend hours telling Dumbledore his Pheonix is not in fact a Fox.
7.) I will not ram my flying car into the school.
8.) I will ~~not~~ wear a pink "My Little Pony" Bathrobe to class.
9.) I will not yell "DON'T YOU MEAN VOLDEMORT?" Whenever someone says "He who shall not be named"
10.) I will not write "Voldemort was here" on my textbooks.

So sorry, could not help myself. =P
~Pyronix~

by **Shadow** on Wed Oct 07, 2009 3:09 pm

I'm too lazy to think of my own, so here is a page of 'em ;D
Google is ossim.

http://drmikessteakdinner.com/2006/03/10/50-things-not-to-do-at-hogwarts/

by **Rage** on Wed Oct 07, 2009 11:08 pm

I will not start singing "Defying Gravity" during my first broomstick lesson.
I will not use the Polyjuice Potion for my own personal enjoyment. (i.e. *HONK HONK*)
I will not feed the Sorting Hat any sort of bubble gum before the orientation ceremony.
I will not shout out "THE CAKE IS A LIE!!!" when in the mess hall. The ghosts don't seem to like that.
I will not start house wars, no matter how tempting and easy it would be.
<.< >.>
*hides bag of feces with "Huflepuffz" written on it*

I will not call the Slytherines "Trouser snakes" or shout "Tunnel Snakes RULE!!!".
I will not tell the Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff houses that no one cares about them. Seriously.
I will not hold Professor Flitwick's wand out of his reach just to see "a midget jump".
I will not try to play "PARKOUR" after learning the levitation spell.
I will not try to get people to experience "Marylin Monroe" moments with their school robes because of the wind charm.
I will not start quoting Zombieland and start saying "Double Tap!!!" when asked on how to defeat an undead foe during Defense Against the Dark Arts.
--->On that same note, I will not start telling fat students that they will be zombies due to the rule of ----"Cardio". Yeah, I'm looking at you, Hufflepuff. >:l
I will not turn people into donkeys to prove a point.
I will also not turn females into dogs to prove a point.
I will definitely not turn myself into a cat and pose in some ridiculous picture.

Spoiler:

Lastly, I will never ever EVER tell someone about candlejack in fear of him getting magical powers and kidna

by **Hunter Reckoning** on Thu Oct 08, 2009 6:23 am

These are things i think harry would be writing on the chalkboard for punishment.

1.)I will not use my wand to text during class.
2.)I will not tag all of the halls by using the spray paint spell.
3.)"I was taken over by the dark lord." I NOT a way to get out of beating up Nevel.
4.)I will not take Luna's shoes and put them in hard to reach places in the school.
5.)I will not turn Harmoine into a cat.
6.)I will not give Snape wedgies in class.

by Chiyuki on Thu Oct 08, 2009 7:08 am

1. I will not claim that Chuck Norris killed Voldemort
2. I will not dance on a table singing "Do You Believe in Magic" during lunch
3. I will not blow up the potions classroom on purpose
4. I will not throw a teapot at Proffessor Trelawney (more than once)
5. I will not genetically splice Filch and Mrs. Norris
6. I will not change all of the house banners to neon pink with bunnies on them
7. I will not run around on the Quidditch pitch after a match singing "We are the Champions" at the top of my lungs
8. I will not flood the dungeons with pudding

by **Hunter Reckoning** on Fri Oct 09, 2009 9:25 am

1. I will not turn Ron Weaslie into a weasel and say. "He told me he wanted to embrace his heritage!"
2. I will not put a love potion on all of the girls in school.
3. I will not call Harry Potter bad words because of his last name.
4. Its "Dumbledore" Not "Dumb-bull-dork"
5. I will not "pimp" out my broom with pieces from Dumdores car.

by **Juliana** on Fri Oct 09, 2009 9:57 am

1) I will not refer to my fellow Ravenclaws as "bookheads" or "nerdballs," no matter HOW much they deserve the epithet.

'Nuff said.

by **Erik** on Fri Oct 09, 2009 6:32 pm

1. I will not call the mad eye moody a freak, no matter how much he looks like one
2. I will not put acid in everyones potions in potions class.
3. I will not harass Hagrid with how a giant and a human could, you know.
4. I will not steal Dumbledore's Phoenix Faux to be my pet.
5. I will not turn Professor McGonagall (sp) into a frog.
6. I will not steal candy from Dumbledore (Think of the consequences!!!!!)

by **Hunter Reckoning** on Sat Oct 10, 2009 4:47 am

1. When i get the golden.... thing... (Golden Snitch!) I will not hold it up to my eye and sing "eye of the tiger"

by 5secondchaos on Mon Dec 28, 2009 6:26 pm

I will not grow marijuana or magic mushrooms and claim that they are extra credit project for Herbology when I am caught.

I will not refer to showering as "giving Moaning Myrtle an eyeful".

I will not tell Ron and Hermione to "Get a room" whenever they start to fight.

I am not allowed to bring a "Tasmanian devil" to Hogwarts as my pet.

I am not to stick pieces of paper on the common room notice board claiming "Proffesor Lupin want's a flea collar for Christmas".

I will not offer to pose nude for Colin Creevey.

I will not ask Dumbledore to show me the pointy hat trick.

by Javiersito2 on Mon Dec 28, 2009 11:52 pm

In Hogwarts you don't ever shake a painting, you might get a spell cast on you and you end up in the portrait too

by Weena on Tue Dec 29, 2009 9:52 am

1. I will not use any wizard swears (i.e, Cauldron Bum, Son of a Banshee, Swish and slicker, Voldemort's nipple, Dragon bogies, Expecto Patronads, Rabble Rousers, Hagrid's Butcrack, Jiggery Pokery, Blast-ended Skank, Broomhead, Leprechaun Taint, Unicorn Turds, Muggle po*beep*ing troge*beep* it, Flobby-wanded Dementor Boggerer, Dobby's Sock, Flupdoodle, Your mother is a *beep beep beep*ing*beep*lorem ipsum*beep beep beep*admiumvenium*beep beep beep beep*turolagulio*beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep* hippopotamus*beep beep beep beep beep beep* Republican *beep beep beep* Daniel Radcliffe *beep beep beep beep* with a bucket of *beep beep beep beep* in a castle far away where no one can hear you *beep beep beep beep beep beep* soup *beep beep beep* with a bucket of *beep beep* Mickey Mouse *beep beep* with a stick of dinomite *beeeeeepppp* magical *beep beep beep beep* ALAKAZAM! (aka the elder swear)) (References to Potter Puppet Pals - Wizard Swears)

And that is all. :3

by Javiersito2 on Tue Dec 29, 2009 9:55 am

Do you really want to get started with Harry Potter swear words, me boy??

well I gotta say

Blasted Cauldron!

by Weena on Tue Dec 29, 2009 10:12 am

:P But still, you seriously SHOULD check out Wizard swears (link ^ there), it is soo epic. :D

What NOT To do at Hogwarts!

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