Re: Consider This An SOS

by **Charon** on Fri Dec 04, 2009 12:56 pm

You know, Juli...I suffer from what you're going through every now and then. And I'm not saying that I feel bad when I have a kind of bad day. I mean I have been to the point you have been, but I always find a reason for life, as hard as that is. Everyone here at TR obviously loves you, myself included. We may not see you IRL, but really, that can be a good thing! We know you for who you really are, not for what you look like, dress like, etc, and we still love you. You are an amazing person, and you don't deserve to feel this poorly about yourself. Think of all the things you are good at (writing, for example), all the things you have accomplished, all of the people whose lives you have influenced. Every person has a reason to live, and you are no exception.

Consider us your shoulder to cry on, your pillow to beat up, and your friends, IRL or not.

Love you Juli.

by **Winnie** on Fri Dec 04, 2009 7:43 pm

We ALL love you, Juli.

We all love you so much if you ever need anyone to talk to you can call me, or amara, talk to us, and you can MAKE friends IRL! I'm shure there's a group you fit in in, and all you need is some cheers. It's almost the holidays. I'm shure you'll feel better soon.

by **Rage** on Sat Dec 05, 2009 1:40 am

Juli, I never thought of you as being a coward. Suicide is the path of cowards. That is not you.

Have you thought about maybe volunteering at any local events at church or something? Maybe start getting involved in some after-school activities? Frick, there are many people here even on this forum who just let their emotions fly by writing it off in literature.

Maybe an MSN chat with one of the TR members that you are closest to would help as well. My friend actually talks to his girlfriend in Texas through MSN and Video Chat on a frequent basis even though they never get to see one another. That's another bond that you can attempt with a couple of people that you know on here. Heck, I wouldn't mind talking to a couple of TR Members myself (like Flaw, for instance. Good times on XBL, btw.).

Point is, life has a strange way of making things work in the end. A person could fall from grace in an instant after a catastrophe, and yet they will attempt to pick up the pieces and build a better tomorrow. Do you really want to give up that easily? Is that really the person behind the wonderful literature on the Word Gallery? Is that you?

You don't usually see me breaking my silence or jumping out of character like this. Trust me, you're worth more than you realize, even if it's not apparent yet. Remember the movie "The Butterfly Effect"? Every action, every connection, every relationship you've ever had has made a difference, whether it be large or small. Time and the Universe cannot pretend to look with a blind eye upon your existence because the world is inevitably changed by you simply "being". You cut your own influence short by curtailing your own time before it is due.

Now, my only question is this: Who are you, and what are you going to do about it?

by Deathclaws on Sat Dec 05, 2009 2:40 am

You see, we all get depressed at times, especially in puberty. Its just natural in some obscure way, and this guy, an ocean removed from you, has the same problem on bad days. Hey, I don't know you like the other TR members here, all I can tell you: Life is somehow worth living. And if its just to write another story, recite another poem, or read another great book. Whenever I get depressed, I delve into the works of HP Lovecraft, lose myself in phrases, fantasies, an other world. Because it always passes, eventually, when the sun just rises again, casting a little light in a dark, seemingly rather miserable world. Or when you get a good mark back, something along those lines.

Also, all these answers alone ought to show you: People care. and as long as someone cares, theres something to exist for.

by **Winnie** on Sat Dec 05, 2009 3:31 am

We live, we love,
we forgive,
and we never give up.
'Cause the days we are gived are gifts from above,
and today we remember to live and to love.

Superchick is inspiring- Try listening to some of their music. Music helps.

by **Juliana** on Sun Dec 06, 2009 6:03 am

Thanks, y'all... it means so, so much to me that you would say these things. And I am desperate... I have so few friends IRL, because the following is my unfortunate situation:

I have far too much homework to do any volunteer work or attend any kind of meeting other than church. Outside of school and church, AQW and TR comprise the full extent of my social life; inside of school, there is almost no time to socialize, and I have only three friends there because the entire rest of the school considers me pretty much a sideshow freak. I used to hang out with other groups, but then discovered that they just wanted to laugh at me. This is not a new story for me, but I am utterly sick of it. This is unlikely to change until I move somewhere else. I used to put up with being an object of ridicule because I was so desperate for some kind of friendship, but I've figured out that it's worse that way.

I'm not going to kill myself; let me put that out there unambiguously. I'm not going to because so far, I'm more selfless than selfish. If I cared only about myself, I would absolutely kill myself, because I have such a hard time dealing with this world, and when I think about the future I only see it getting harder. But I'm not selfish enough to just give up. I know that if I did, I would hurt my friends... and that's why I need to know for sure that I do have friends...

by **Winnie** on Mon Dec 28, 2009 6:41 am

Hey Guys, bad news for me...

Now I'm feeling all depressed. I don't know why, I'm getting all angsty and I want to accomplish somthing in my life and I think It's kinda unhealthy. I don't know. I had the same thing at the end of march and june. It makes me feel like i'm a little nothing in this entire world and I'm all depressed. Help!

by **Juliana** on Tue Dec 29, 2009 2:18 pm

But you have Musetta's Waltz...

All facetiousness aside, Winnie... trust me, you're worth it. Accomplish something? You've already accomplished quite a bit. You were one of the friends that got me through the worst of my own depression (which will be officially over, by my count, as soon as I can get rid of the last of these suicidal impulses, and that is looking like a pretty achievable goal now), not to mention that you're an amazing artist, a promising writer, and a very good friend to plenty of us on here. Am I right, TR?

by Atriax on Tue Dec 29, 2009 6:12 pm

Watch this.
If any of you know skyress, she had a similar problem. She watched this, and it cheered her up.
Motto of the story: When depressed, watch Monty python xD

P.S I'v never been in such a position, so I'm not entirely sure how to help. watching that'll cheer you up for sure :P

by **Winnie** on Tue Dec 29, 2009 8:16 pm

Actually, you've managed to bring back a memory of me driving in the car with this playing... I have no idea why...

for some reason I associate it with a dark and very expensive forest.

by Atriax on Tue Dec 29, 2009 8:33 pm

I associate it with laughter :P

by Guest on Sat Jan 09, 2010 6:53 am

I'm not so good with this emotional stuff... I think you should just find a hobby to put your mind off of it. If you think you're offending someone, you should be able to see it in their face, body language, etc.

by **Erik** on Sat Jan 09, 2010 7:49 am

Juliana, your not alone. I am sort of friends with everyone in the school, but I have only a couple main friends. Think of how good of friends those four people are. :)

by darketh2 on Tue Jan 12, 2010 6:14 am

juli i am your frend i am here for you i am like one of the nicest kids in the scholl but everyone calls me a geek and be happy you only got one disoder i got theyrod disoder speech disoder math displaxey hdhd juli if you ever need anyone to talk to i am here for here is you want to meet me on aqw i will be on csyero server

edit: one other depersoin is comen in pubrity and guss what i am expreiceing right now so like i said before if you need someone to talk to i am here for you