The Other Side of Insanity (My Contribution to Peregrine's Wild Storyline)

The scene opens in a field a short ways out of town on a peaceful, starry night. Everything is silent but for the chirping of one bored but dutiful cricket. Suddenly, the cricket is interrupted by the sound of a tremendous explosion from the strip mall on the edge of town. In the light from the explosion, the figure of a young man is visible, flung quite some distance into the field by the concussion of the blast. He lands flat on his face and lies still for a long moment, during which the cricket starts chirping tentatively again, then picks himself up and dusts off his front. It is MrSebi.

MrSebi: Unbelievable. I don't even know who they were!

Seeing no reason to elaborate on his cryptic utterance, Sebi proceeds on in the direction of the cricket. A second, nearer explosion sends a hot wind blowing towards his back moments later. The cricket is silent a moment, and chirps faster when it picks back up again.

MrSebi: Getting warmer, isn't it, Mr. Cricket?
Cricket: Chirpchirpchirp?

Sebi might have replied, but is distracted by a faraway buzzing from somewhere ahead of him. He spies a young woman running toward him with a swarm of bees as large as full-grown humans in distant pursuit. He reacts in puzzlement, wondering if he knows who she is--or knew, in another life. Then she crests the hill and he recognizes her face.

MrSebi: ...Juliana?
Juliana: Who are you? Wait... Sebi? Are you talking?
MrSebi: Yes... remember? During the battle for TR, I was cured of that stupid insanity--

Another explosion interrupts him. No one seems to notice except for the now-terrorized cricket.

Juliana: Oh, I must have missed hearing about that... somehow. I was very much occupied around that time. What was causing it?
MrSebi: Vamp jammed a purple crayon up my nose. And left it there. For years. Then Rob pulled it out, and I was cured.
Juliana:But how could a crayon in your nose have precipitated the patterns of behavior I observed?
MrSebi: My hypothesis is that the intransitory properties of the wax and an undesirable nervous immune reaction within my intranasal epithelium produced a chronic hallucinatory effect.
Juliana: Plausible, but you neglect to account for the minor respiratory obstruction that might enhance said negative neurological consequences and perhaps relate to the instantaneous onset and relief of symptoms.
MrSebi: That is a valid argument, which would certainly explain... wait... you can understand me?
Juliana: Yes, of course! Perhaps your diction evinces occasional traces of a mildly foreign accent, but on the whole your entire discourse has taken on remarkable clarity.

The two stare delightedly at each other for a long moment, before a shout from one direction and a redoubled buzzing from the other remind them that they are both being pursued. Both of them go for their weapons.

Juliana: What have you got to defend yourself with, anyhow?
MrSebi: Magical machete, you?
Juliana: Only got my war hammer with me.

She shows him a framing hammer, too small to weigh more than a pound. The huge, proud grin on her face is wildly disproportionate to the tiny hammer in her hand.

MrSebi: Are you sure that's the best tool for this job?

By way of answer, Juliana spins around to meet the first of the approaching bees and smashes its head in with a maniacal giggle.

MrSebi: I'm not going to argue with your hammer.
Juliana: Good choice. Let's get out of here.

They turn in a direction from which no one is coming and take off running. An explosion behind them catapults them forward, also managing to slow the bees down. They are running very hard, leaving neither with enough breath to ask the other some very pertinent questions. This does not stop them from trying.

Juliana: So--*pant*--who--*pant*--chases--*pant*--you?
MrSebi: No--*pant*--clue.

Okay, so I underestimated them. Sue me. I'm only the narrator.

MrSebi: Where'd--*pant*--giant--*pant*--bees--*pant*--come--*pant*--from?
Juliana: Long--*pant*--story.

Eventually they come across an old barn and run inside, slamming the door shut behind them. There they pause to catch their breath, only to hear an ominous buzzing sound from somewhere above them. One of the giant bees emerges from the shadows of the hayloft. Juli yelps and hides behind Sebi.

MrSebi: What's wrong?
Juliana: I'm scared of these things...
MrSebi: Don't worry, they can't hurt you.
Juliana: Sure they can. See that sharp thing on its rear?
MrSebi: Right... never mind...

They ready their weapons. The bee darts at them. It is fast, but Sebi's sword is faster. Just when it seems that they are safe, several more of the swarm appear. Juliana lets out an exasperated mumble.

Juliana: ¿Moros en la costa? ¡Hay muchos moros en la costa!
MrSebi: What was that?
Juliana: Spanish for "the coast is definitely not clear."

Whatever else might have been said is lost in the buzzing as the giant bees attack. The fight goes well for the new friends at first, but it quickly becomes obvious that there are just too many bees for them to keep this up forever. Will they make it out alive? Join us next time for the exciting conclusion!